Dorkgasm Gonzo Is God

Whup-ass fajitas. The OK Corral. Sack-o-matic. Ding, dong! “The plan”. Mike Tyson. These are only a few things that I will be laughing about for some time after seeing The Boondock Saints II: All Saints Day. As any Saints fan will tell you, there are certain catch phrases from the first movie that, when said, will let you know that you are part of something special. The nod and wink you get from someone when you ask if they are “oh-be-kay-be”, or when you speculate about being “serial crushed by a huge, friggin' guy”. It is not just a movie, it is more like an extended family. All Saints Day is a love letter to every fan who has supported the first film and rocked a prayer on a t-shirt.

Troy Duffy's newest directorial effort, The Boondock Saints II starts out with brothers Connor (Sean Patrick Flanery, Powder) and Murphy (Norman Reedus, Blade II) hiding out in rural Ireland with their father Noah “Il Duce” MacManus (Billy Connelly, Fido). They lived a life of sheep herding and Irish stew, having left their blood-soaked Boston pasts behind. Unfortunately, their past catches up with them as a popular Boston priest is brutally murdered in their signature style of two shots to the back of the head and pennies on the eyes. Sure enough, before you can say fuck-ass, Connor and Murphy shed their Tom Hanks-like long hair and beards and head back to America. Along the way, they meet a new sidekick in Romeo (Clifton Collins, Jr., Capote), a Connor-proclaimed “greasy spic” who wants in on the clean up crew. They also learn of the criminal empire that is being rebuilt by Concezio Yakavetta (Judd Nelson, The Breakfast Club), the son of “Poppa Joe” Yakavetta from the first movie. Yakavetta is responsible for the murder that brought the boys back home, so the MacManus brothers arrive in Boston with a taste for vengeance.

The murder does not go unnoticed by Boston, either. Soon rabid crowds turn up begin to turn up at the murder site, both damning the Saints and proclaiming their innocence. Boston's finest show up, represented by BDS vets detectives Greenly (Bob Marley), Duffy (Brian Mahoney), and Dolly (Brian Ferry). The trio are instantly reminded about their role in the brothers' bloody retribution, and begin to sweat when the Feds show up in the form of Special Agent Eunice Bloom (Julie Benz, Rambo), a former protege of Paul Smecker (a sadly missing face from this movie). While Connor, Murphy, and Romeo begin meting out street justice, Bloom and the detectives slowly begin putting the pieces together to either help the Saints or put them away for life. Finally, the boys catch up to their target only to find out that Yakavetta may not be the only player in the game and they may have stumbled into something bigger than they thought.

Overall, this movie surpasses the original in many ways. Most of our favorite players return for Round Two, even some of the smaller parts. Doc (Gerald Parkes),who you may know better as “Fuck-Ass”, provides one of the funniest scenes in the movie when he meets up with the brothers again, and even the nameless Irish arms dealer (Tom Barnett) returns for another meetup, prompting one of the best music cues ever. Even though this movie is about reuniting an amazing cast, the new characters pull their weight admirably. Special Agent Bloom is a fine foil to our heroes, a strong and devious woman who is not above using her looks to hide a brilliant deductive mind. The standout, however, is the new character Romeo. With Rocco having been snuffed in the first film, the film needed a comic relief character to balance out all of the gratuitous violence, and Clifton Collins, Jr. delivers it in spades. His wide-eyed and emotional Mexican character provides cultural differences and some of the best lines in the movie.

Now, lest you think that I loved this movie unconditionally, there were some things I thought could have better. While the first film took its time establishing the world these characters lived in with slow, dream-like shots at times, this film takes the music video approach of jerky movement and frenetic action. In some cases, bigger is most definitely not better. Also, in some instances, the editing of the storyline became muddled and confusing. The movie is much like the first one, with back tracks and flashbacks a plenty, and this sometimes gets mired down in the attempt to make this pretty and visually exciting. The sound and music were a joy to listen to, and there was plenty of blood to go around, but some of the bigger set pieces made this movie lose some of the intimate appeal of the first one. Quite possibly, the biggest drawback is that non-fans cannot get as much enjoyment out of this movie as the fans will. This movie calls back to the first film so much that it should consider getting free long distance. The in-jokes, the characters, and the world all need a previous knowledge to get the full enjoyment out of it.

With that said, I can honestly say that this is the most fun I have at a movie in a very long time. The humor was such that I left the theater with hurting ribs from laughing so much, and believe me when I say that this is the action film to beat this year. I was fortunate enough to see this movie with a crowd of fans, and every joke and call back was appreciated. When the film was over, there was applause and everyone left with the speculation on if we would have to wait another ten years for the inevitable follow-up that is now most definitely needed. Cheers to Duffy and company for bringing back a beloved world and having the presence of mind to not mess with the established formula too much. One last note: I have kept this spoiler-free for the most part, but there are moments that were not spoiled for me that I cannot spoil for you. Moments that will leave your jaw on the floor. Hurry up and see this because I want people I can gush about this to.

Thanks for comin' out.