Staff Blogs

Zack and Miri Make a Porno | Film Review

Zack and Miri made a porno, Smith and Rogan made me pee my pants
J. Sternberg

            I don't exactly recall when this new trend of great romantic comedies featuring porn side plots and themes began, but at the rate this is going I hope it doesn't stop. Love Actually featured a romance between pornstars (it was one of the minor tales) and was a fantastic film, The Girl Next Door featured an ex-pornstar turning her life around and was also a fantastic film. Zack and Miri Make a Porno continues this trend in the most hardcore of fashions. Written by legendary foul mouthed film god Kevin Smith, and starring Seth Rogan, Elizabeth Banks, and featuring Jason Mewes and a showstealling cameo by Justin Long, Zack and Miri is one of the most vulgar, hilarious, and heartwarming films of the year.

Twilight | Film Review

DG, Its ur BFF Margaret, Omg My Chemical romance is so hot!
J. Sternberg

            So yeah, Twilight, um, where the fuck do I even begin? Well for starters, I am so not this movie's target demographic, I don't shop at Hot Topic, I don't think Vampz roxxor my soxxors, nor am I 16 with female genitalia. I am however an avid fan of actual vampire fiction, and have seen pretty much every piece bloodsucking, fangbanging, holy water, stake to the heart, and crosses fair I could get my grubby little mitts on. On that note I also feel the need to clarify immediately that this film has way more to do with The Sisterhood of The Traveling Pants, than Bram Stoker's Dracula.

Coraline | Trailer Park

A kid's story by Neil Gaiman, directed by the guy from The Nightmare Before Christmas. Sweet!

My Bloody Valentine 3-D | Trailer Park

Say what you want, I think the original was a classic and this shit looks like fun.

Dance Flick!!! | Trailer Park

Fucking.... Shoot..... me. please?

Like a Raised Fist

Today at 9:17am. I voted for the next President of the United States of America. Like millions of other citizens filled in the dash on my ballot and watched it get sucked, rather anticlimactically, into the ballot box. I wanted to hear bells or whistles or have streamers float down from the heavens. But no. Just a quick beep and it was done. My part in this year’s election was done.

Rockhead's 20th Anniversary Party! --or-- The Death Of Comics?

Ah, Rockhead's. If you live in the Kenosha area, no other name is as synonymous with comics and gaming as this one. Back when I was a wee lad just out of the whelping box, I remember when the comic store moved in just across from the Aladdin's Castle arcade in the Market Square complex. Finally! A place where I could get all of my comics in one shot instead of going to all of the other retail stores in town. Yes sir, twenty years ago, I got my first taste of the true comic book store. Now, other comic book stores came and went in this town, but Rockhead's always remained there. Sure, it moved around to a couple different places, but it pretty much remained the same. So, I thought it would be fitting for me to drop in and show my support for the store that gave me my lifeblood for so long ago. So myself and my buddies Randy and Jimmy grabbed some Chinese food and went down to get our comic party on. I do not know what I expected, but I never expected what I saw.

Facebook whispers, "No"... WATCHMEN humor

Now go watch the WATCHMEN trailer again!

The family will once again be united.

Just to give my fellow staff writers and all the readers out there an update, the angelknight will once again be descending on the great city of Kenosha on the 21st of August and I hope to see all my friends very soon as I will be in town for 39 days before I head to Tacoma. Please do me a favor and post a few comments on this thread so I know so of you are still alive and talking to me. I hope to see all of you very soon and hope to hear from you sooner. One other note to all my fellow dork writers and associates keep up the great job on the site and the articles.

Dorkgasm Vs. The World, The Legend of Curly's Gold

On my morning commute a few weeks ago, back before the seas ran retarded with people flocking to see the Dark Knight, I was listening to the radio. Call me old fashioned, but when driving the wide open pitch black roads of Southern Wisconsin before the sun has said hello, I venture on the safe side and allow for the possibility messages from the emergency broadcast system, rather than MP3's or CDs.

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